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put on your paranoid poison hats [Nov. 11th, 2009|09:53 am]
[Current Music |I'm A Cuckoo (Avalanches Remix - Belle & Sebastian]

It just hit me that the only food I know of outside of unprocessed fruit that no one talks smack about is Cheerios.

Please tell me there is no secret, horrible, deadly, Satanic component to Cheerios.

[User Picture]From: mizufae
2009-11-11 02:58 pm (UTC)
Cheerios are full of refined grains and sugars! If you're eating anything other than things you've pulled out of the dirt and placed straight into your mouth after a brisk shake, you're killing yourself!
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[User Picture]From: shaggy_man
2009-11-11 03:20 pm (UTC)
1 gram of sugar per serving is a lot less than most breakfast cereals (e.g. 3 grams in Corn Flakes, 4 in Special K).

But, yeah, the carbs are all refined. So you can fault it for being less healthy than oatmeal. Which isn't really saying much.

Edited at 2009-11-11 07:52 pm (UTC)
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[User Picture]From: benchilada
2009-11-11 03:31 pm (UTC)
Cheerios should be labeled a drug.
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[User Picture]From: mizufae
2009-11-11 03:06 pm (UTC)
Also, if you read Revelations backwards while shaking a box of Cheerios and spill them out on the kitchen table, they will form an ancient sigil that is the Devil's True Name as written in the Black Tongues. Not only will it bring about the apocalypse but you will also burn a nasty mark into your tabletop that will never stop smelling like cat urine and sulfur.
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[User Picture]From: rstevens
2009-11-11 03:09 pm (UTC)
thank GOD
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[User Picture]From: tyrantspike
2009-11-11 03:09 pm (UTC)
eh, keep eating it. everything you eat in the world can kill you slowly anyway; might as well enjoy it while it lasts.

and im pretty sure the vatican is behind the Cheerios conspiracy.
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[User Picture]From: derspatchel
2009-11-11 03:15 pm (UTC)
Cheerios make my belches taste like a truck stop.

That's about the worst thing I can say about 'em.
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[User Picture]From: fungifruit
2009-11-11 03:16 pm (UTC)
Those damn things give me twenty-thousand scovile diarrheas.
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[User Picture]From: daveandmonika
2009-11-11 03:32 pm (UTC)

You are obviously running with the wrong crowd :-p

I color code people on my friend's list and at the angle of the screen I mistook you for a mommy-blogger on my list and my immediate thought when I read your post (other than 'wow, what a short post for Tina!') was "Seriously, Tina, you of all people ought to know about Cheerios!"

Yeah, refined sugar, overly processed in general. Tina's kids have homemade muffins and oatmeal for breakfast ;).

Also a lot of (non-organic) fruit is on the most highly pesticide contaminated list.

My kids eat a lot of each.

Also, in America Cheerios are breakfast cereal, but in other parts of the world they are sausages, which may contain any number of secret components :-p.
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[User Picture]From: xomox
2009-11-11 04:27 pm (UTC)

Re: You are obviously running with the wrong crowd :-p

Cheerios made of sausage? I'm intrigued...
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[User Picture]From: purly
2009-11-11 03:39 pm (UTC)
Tastes like cardboard.
And the honey nut cheerios tastes like cardboard covered in honey.

Strongly suspect that cheerios are in fact cardboard.
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[User Picture]From: mordant
2009-11-11 05:34 pm (UTC)
"Strongly suspect that cheerios are in fact cardboard."

Not enough dietary fiber in 'em for that.
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[User Picture]From: purly
2009-11-11 06:18 pm (UTC)
So they are FULL OF LIES.
Enough of a reason to not eat them.
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[User Picture]From: monkeycomic
2009-11-11 10:13 pm (UTC)
You know how Cheerios don't sink?

You know what else doesn't sink?


(To actual Wiccans reading this--I'm going by Hammer films, not experience.)
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From: lunarworks
2009-11-12 12:39 am (UTC)
I think the name alone is sufficient to cast suspicion upon it,
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[User Picture]From: nerdi
2009-11-12 03:19 am (UTC)
I wonder what Grumpios taste like.
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From: lunarworks
2009-11-12 11:00 pm (UTC)
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[User Picture]From: rachelsoma
2009-11-12 10:49 am (UTC)
Holy shit! American food reference I understand! Except for chicken fried steak, because I ate that in Texas and it frightened me.

I also discovered they sell Cheerios in Australia now and I have a box. Yay, cultural imperialism.
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[User Picture]From: sassyninja
2010-01-19 09:57 am (UTC)
They are not the same my friend. American Cheerios are very different in taste and appearance. I was a very disappointed immigrant.
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[User Picture]From: invisibelle
2009-11-12 05:27 pm (UTC)
It's weird that you mention that, I was thinking the same thing recently.

Other than baby food, it's the one food that is ubiquitously seen being eaten by babies who are still getting used to using their opposable digits.

After pondering this for a while, I eventually concluded that it's their texture that make them seem the antithesis of evil.
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